Friday, February 20, 2009

A Small Incomplete List of Things That Annoy Me

1. When people put an 'h' in words like string or strong. It is not pronounced Shtring. It makes you sounds Shtupid!

2. The misuse of borrow and lend. I will borrow something from you and you will lend it to me.

3. The misuse of scent and flavor. Are you going to eat that candle?

4. "No problem" or "Uh-huh" or "yeah" in response to being thanked. The appropriate response is 'you're welcome!'.

5. Public grooming. I do not want to see you floss your teeth, pluck your eyebrows or clip your nails. You need to go home, in your bathroom and do it there. Understandably, if you are at work and the broccoli you ate is now decorating your front teeth, you can floss in the restroom - NOT at your DESK.

6. Tuneless humming. While it might sound good in your head, it is not quite as delightful to the rest of us.

7. Paris Hilton. Why is she famous?
She looks like an afghan dog.

8. White people who try to sound 'homie'. Or dress like a 'homie'. Yo! You look shtupid!

9. Boys who wear their pants so low their undies are on display. When I see this, I want to yank their pants down to their ankles. It is unlikely they would be able to chase me after said yanking.
10. People who hate entire groups of based on color, religion, political belief...

11. Parents who don't clean up after their kids or teach their kids to clean up. Ditto for dog owners who walk their dogs for the express purpose of dog pooping in someone else's yard. As delightful as your dog is, his poop is not my delight. Pick it up or keep it in your own yard.

12. Celebutards who support or respect the president only when they agree with him.

13. The continual ads on Facebook about weight loss, diets, botox, wrinkles..etc. I don't care how old Jennifer Aniston is or how young she looks. We should all have a fleet of chefs, a personal trainers, make up and hair people.

14. People with bumper stickers that implore 'Save the Whales' and demand 'Keep Abortion Legal!'

15. Comedians who use profanity and vulgarity to hide the fact that they are not funny.

16. Men who don't open doors for women. Yes, I know. There are probably tons of women who hate when men open doors, those chivalrous few, but this is my blog, not theirs.

17. Mascara ads that show models with thick, full lashes, failing to mention that said lashes are augmented with falsies.

18. A society which thinks that Jessica Simpson is fat! The girl has an honest to goodness female body. She looks healthy, not emaciated or androgynous. The wardrobe choice, is another topic altogether.

19. That people feel entitled to know every detail about well known people. I think it is shameful and disrespectful that pictures of Rhianna taken after she was assaulted have been published. It is bad enough she was treated that way but to add insult to injury, literally, by publishing those pictures is beyond belief.

20. That the media no longer presents information impartially. They are there to report, not spin or push an agenda.

21. People who claim to be ardent Catholics or any type of Catholic but support things that are clearly in serious defiance of church teaching. Also those who try to pervert or subvert the church. Why don't they just create their own church instead of tearing down the one true Church?