Friday, October 2, 2009

Confession of a bad wife

I am a bad wife. I don't cook or clean my house very often. I don't take care of my husband the way I should, certainly not the way he'd like. I didn't start out that way. When I was a single mom, my house was always clean and neat, I cooked and fed my daughter the way a mother should. I had no one else to rely upon so I did what I needed to do.

Then I got married with dreams of sharing household duties, working side by side with my husband who dreamed of a wife like June Cleaver. Why should I have to do everything when we both are working full time? Gradually resentment, stubbornness, pride, disordered priorities, too little humility and too much love of self led me to where I am now.

But, I want to change my ways. Can I get a hallelujah? I will have to start out slowly because I know if I try to change overnight, that's not going to happen. So here's my plan ( and you'll probably think "duh!"): I'll do what I should before what I want; clean the kitchen, do the dishes before getting on the computer or reading a book. That simple. I'll start to plan meals again. I'll start to live like I did when I had no one else to rely upon. I'll do what I need to do and I won't wait for my husband to jump in and help or feel resentful if he doesn't.

How's this for a huge poke from God? One of the books I purchased at the Graced & Gifted conference is called Graced & Gifted, biblical wisdom for the homemaker's heart. I hadn't realized what it was about when I bought it. I picked it up by mistake thinking it was a different book. I know from Whom the desire to change came and I am thankful.

Please pray that I do my task with love and change my ways.

O Mary, conceived without sin, you were a homemaker. Please bless all the wives and mothers who struggle sometimes to take care of their loved ones.


Cathy_of_Alex said...

Pick the most pressing need each day and do that!
Prayers here!

Mary333 said...

I will pray for you, also. Remember though, God does not want you to feel overwhelmed. Sometimes we can try to do too much:)

Mairin :o) said...

Thank you both for the prayers!

AnneMarie said...

Amen.. I need to look it as a blessing.. I prayed and prayed for all this laundry.. and now I have it! lol!
it is tough and at times overwhelming. When I don't want to do it the most I say a Hail Mary and sometimes it does the trick to remind me what I NEED to be doing :)